There are many different parenting styles out there today that go from one extreme to the next, so it's no surprise that one parent may feel another parents styles are bizarre or even down right wrong. But what shocks me, is the amount of disrespect out there towards parents choices.
"You don't have to Like my choices….but you DO have to Respect them!"
That is a quote that I've had to say many many times. There's days where I get so tired of feeling like I have to Defend my parenting choices just because someone doesn't like them, or understand them. I made a decision earlier this year to no longer 'play defense'. These are My children and I am parenting them the way that I know is the best and only way for me. And if someone doesn't like that – well that's their own problem.
I am passionate about the choices I have made. But do I belittle those who make different choices? No. They have a right to their choices just as much as I do to mine.
I breastfeed. I've breastfed all 7 of my children; as newborns, as toddlers, in public, at home, any time and any where. My youngest 4 children have never even had a taste of formula. I believe that every child in the world has the right to breastmilk, and I will strongly urge any mother to be I come across to at least Try it. But are they any less a mother of they don't? No.
My babies do not CIO (Cry It Out). I have never practiced the Cry It Out method with any of my children. I personally think it is a cruel practice, especially for infants, to be left alone crying for the purpose of 'training' them. It is my opinion that you 'train' an animal, Not a child. But will I go up to a mother who let's her child CIO and tell her she is neglecting her child? No. I can only hope that she has decided to do this practice after fully researching and understanding what the side effects can be. I'd probably even offer some information to her about the negative consequences.
I had 3 of my boys circumcised, and left 2 uncircumcised. So which one do I believe in? Well with my first 3 boys I just thought you were Supposed to have them circumcised and never questioned it. But with my youngest 2 boys I was educated on the subject and discovered that I have a choice. So my recommendation would be to Not circumcise. But would I tell a new mother who had her baby circ'd that she abused and mutilated him? Absolutely not.
The list goes on with things like natural child birth, vaccinations, co-sleeping, babywearing, etc, so I'll stop there as to not write a book lol. I just want all my readers to know, that while I will be posting here and there about parenting issues I am very passionate about, the opinions I express are my own and I never want anyone to feel that I'm saying "I'm better than you" or that if you parent differently you are doing it wrong. I believe that as parents we are All doing our best to do what we believe is best for our children. And as long as we put our childrens needs above our own, we cannot go wrong.
I agree with all of what you have said and I tend to be on the side of more ‘natural’ parenting as well. I try not to judge others but a lot of times get judged myself in return!
A lot of things I am very against and it makes me sad that they are done (as you mentioned like circ, CIO) but I try not to judge others too harshly as it is their life and sometimes societal pressure is just so much a mom is convinced into what she is ‘suppose’ to be doing, versus what she feels is right.
Great post
Too true, too true. It’s between two parents as well too! My husband wants to do things one way, and I feel differently and want to do them another. We had to learn to compromise, but we never officialy say ‘you’re wrong’ to each other.
As for breastfeeding, I breastfed mine until she was ready to wean at one and a half. During that time, I had so many telling me NOT to do it. It was weird because I feel breastfeeding is the best. Yet my mother, my mother-in-law, my grandmother-in-law all kept saying formula was best.
I don’t judge people, but I wish I wasn’t judged in return.